I'll Be the Wings That Keep Your Heart In the Clouds :)

Misdescribed

2011-07-14T00:35:00.000+08:00

When a person is feeling sad, it is important that they share their feelings with their friends. One of the best ways to process feelings is to share them with friends. Many people are under the mistaken notion that they should not share feelings of sadness because it will bring down the moods of others. This may be true. However, more often than not, we may be able to offer comfort to each other and our friendship will become deeper through the process.

I've been called a hypocrite due to too much sharing, i shall share no more, never again!

Good thing it has ended or may I say is it a good thing that it has ended~

This is all for you, i hope it will at least make you realize something

2011-07-13T01:44:00.000+08:00

Hello and Goodbye doesnt happen only between lovers, they often happen to friendships also

I guess bitching about me on your blogsite is a remarkable matter for you

I cared too much babe, tired of apologizing and tired of trying to be perfect when you think Im putting on an act

You did not try to talk, you chose to criticised me in a way I've never expected

If only you can be a lil' bit honest

2011-07-13T01:23:00.001+08:00

Humans, do things without thinking and regretting it only after it had been done, i just did something beyond my control, I ended a 2years plus friendship, simply because that close friend of mine was bitching about me on her blogsite, to admit, it hurts you know, it really does, if it doesnt, i wouldn't have cried like a little girl who lost her mommy in the middle of a crowd in a shopping mall, I am not mad but surprised instead, how a person who is so close to you end up ripping you apart, congrats to you! Well I guess I was being extra cruel when I choose to end our friendship rather than trying to hold on, but guess what..

Im tired of trying to be a good friend when fact is I fail and fail several times, and worst still my bestfriend of mine thinks Im acting whenever I cry or complaint to her, by other means, to gain sympathy how nice can that be huh.. I guess its a part of life, this friend of mine has always been telling me 'dont let people's words drain you down' and surprisingly she had hurt me the most, not sure whether she even realizes it, if you think Im strong enough to take this burden, you got that wrong, maybe Im just miserable at best, everything i had ever done or anyway I had been acting and behaving, it has never been a part of some low-class 'menagih simpati drama', why didnt you sprinkle poison into that awesome spaghetti you made for me, I guess Im at fault too by saying, 'this friendship ends right here right now'

I myself cant believe i actually said that, but what else can I do, what has happened already happened, I cant go around acting like nothing happened or simply go and remove my post, I lost my bestfriend and for now, I only have one Dec girl left for me to really talk to, babe! IF ONLY YOU TRIED TO TALK AND NOT BY PREDICTING AS IF I AM NOT GONNA LISTEN WHEN YOU DO I guess the both of us just need some time to be alone, if this friendship was meant to be, then it will certainly get back into shape, unfortunately if its not meant to be, it will remain as 'broken pieces of glass' exactly like what I dreamt of earlier..

IF BEFORE THIS I HAVE TOO MUCH TO BLOG YET I DIDN’T DO SO, I GUESS YOU DID A GREAT JOB BY MAKING ME BLOG SIMPLY ABOUT YOU, THUMBS UP

2011-07-13T00:38:00.001+08:00

Well I hope you know this post is for you, please read it carefully, try to understand every single word and sentence, though I might not be that perfect in writing like you do, I hope its good enough for a perfectionist like you to understand, I’ve known you for 2 years plus, we never had any problems back then, but as day goes by I realized we’re drifting far apart, though not obviously.. Im surprised by how quick you can turn out to be, urmm ‘evil’ I may say, or maybe that doesn’t affect you in anyway as you yourself know you can be very very MEAN sometimes. Im tired of keeping up with all your so-called perfectionist attitude, I’ve never bitch about you, not even a single thing to anyone, and this is how you repay me huh? NICE, NICE! ..

When people have weaknesses, they'll hide it. Like a dark deep secret, it should be tucked in deep somewhere, hidden, so that no one can ever find it. Funny, how it's a different case for you. How cunning of you to use your weakness to shield yourself. I have to give it to you though, you're smart in that way. Cheers to you, dear.

---When people have weakness, they don’t have to hide it from their bestfriends, I had never tried to be cunning to use my weakness to SHIELD myself! If you think that way, well I guess im just me, and I don’t have to be like you, hiding all your weakness and all you can do is just by blogging so that no one knows! For your information, from now onwards, you will know nothing about me anymore, none of my weakness neither in what Im perfect in!

It's amazing how sensitive you can be when the story is about you but when the story involves other people, I don't know where your sensitivity went. All those small little things that you happen to do or didn't do; I noticed girl. Every single one of it. And truthfully, it gets pretty annoying day by day.

---Before you even say this to me, look yourself into the mirror, when the story is about you, you get really sensitive, even a phrase like ‘rambut kau colour kan, kau tak boleh jadi imam’ and ‘mana tudung, tak pakai pulak dah’ sensitive much huh, when all people’s intention was just to say, say without any bad feelings, and when you go around blogging about your own bestfriend, you never think whether or not you will hurt that person, now where did your sensitivity went? perhaps I might have to be like you after this, like what malay saying sounds like ‘tebalkan muka, pedulikan je perasaan orang lain, yang penting diri sendiri puas hati’

Turn the table around, twist the story, play with words, I'll give it all to you. In other words, I am amazed how manipulative you can be. You got me fooled once, but lucky for me I quickly realised that it is all game for you so you can't fool me twice. And sucks for me, you're the one who's winning. Cheers to you again, dear.

---Honestly, I don’t get what you mean in this point, I’ve never had any intention to FOOL you, as a normal human being, I don’t play stupid games like what you said and what more FOOLING my own bestfriend, and tell you what! You have to stop thinking as if only other people wins and you’re always the loser, isn’t that a way for people to have pity on you thinking as if ‘ohhh kesian you asyik jadi loser je, let that person be la, she might win now but not forever’

Now, let's talk about your innocence. Oh, you play the part real swell girl. Act all pitiful, and weak, and basically innocent in order to gain people's pity. Well I must say once again that I was fooled by your tears; once. But again, I've realised your game. So you won't be able to fool me twice. You can keep on crying after this and make me look like the bad girl who took the little girl's candy away, but shall I say my dear, the truth shall prevail.

---You know something, I fucking hate your statement! Its like, "ouchhhh :( " “Act all pitiful, and weak, and basically innocent in order to gain people’s pity, if you can have the heart to say this, Im sorry but you’re the worst friend I’ve ever known, in conclusion, “YOU DON’T KNOW ME THAT WELL, SO DON’T ACT LIKE YOU DO” I wont be crying over this matter cause it will only make me look like a loser to you and there you'll go, thinking as if Im acting, AGAIN -.-..

Oh, and before I forget let me just tell you that you should stop being so hypocrite in front of me. I think I've known you quite well to know when you're lying and when you're being sincere. Quit the act my dear, I am sick of watching all you re-runs. Seriously, I do. You're not the greatest actress after all. No applause for you here.

---Who’s the one being a hypocrite here? Let me repeat, if you really do know me well, you will know when Im lying and when Im being sincere, who are you to tell me to quit an act I’ve never started when you’re one of the hypocrite like you just mentioned, act all innocent in front of me, act nice telling me ‘don’t let people bring you down’ when fact is you’re the one who is ripping me apart, let me ask you, what kind of friend will bitch his/her close friend in his/her blogsite and let the whole world know, for your information, I dare to swear to God, never even once I talked bad about you in anyway to anyone, its sad as this is what I get in return. What a HYPOCRITE you are! I dont need an applause from you anyway~

Maybe I am not so perfect to be telling you all these. Maybe I wasn't being such a good friend. Like you said, if I appreciate this friendship I should have tell you sooner. Maybe you're right but truthfully, I don't know how to tell you all these things 'cause I somehow knew that you wouldn't be listening. It is almost I can predict your reaction if I would've told you all these to your face. Or maybe I just don't know if I appreciate this friendship enough to even tell you in the first place.

---Well let’s just make it easier, ‘kalau betul kau kawan baik aku, kau takkan rasa yang aku takkan dengar kalau kau cakap apa2’ do you even understand bahasa melayu? Im not sure if you do cause you’re ‘budak BEN’ remember? It means, if you’re really my friend, you would have do the right thing which is by telling me everything that ure unsatisfied about, you don’t know how you hurt me when I offered to have lunch at your place and your answer was ‘I don’t feel like doing it anymore’ you should imagine me saying that to you, yet I acted fine and if you could go and re-read the text I sent, you will see how I apologize not because Im at fault but its simply because I truly appreciate our friendship, but what did you do? NOTHING!

You'd probably talk about your problems and weaknesses first in order to tell me that I am adding salt to your current wound, then you'd probably be all sensitive and will start crying, then you'll apologise for your wrongs but later on, you'll turn the table around and somehow manipulate things to make me feel guilty, and again you would act all innocent and sad; making me look like the bad guy and lastly, you'll be a hypocrite by saying things such as "Let's forget about this" and "I forgive you" and bla bla bla.

---What’s your main point actually? The phrase ‘let’s forget about this’ comes sincerely from my heart, but by what you have written in this blogpost, Im sure your ‘I forgive you’ does not come sincerely from your heart, awesome!

Just a prediction but it has happened more than once, so I am not surprise if it'll happen again. This is kinda harsh isn't it? I know, I can be a little mean sometimes. But hey, look on the bright side. Maybe you can use this as a story on how a bad girl treats you like shit after all the "good intentions" you had for her. Whatever and however it is, put it to a good use will ya? :)

---Yeah, its too harsh and I never expect you to turned out to be so evil though, I am looking on the bright side, but you know what, you need to have some feelings too, I know that it’s your blog and you have the right to write whatever you want about whoever you want, I will sure put this to a good use, thanks a lot!

So babe, I’ve reached the conclusion..call me an actress, anggap la I ni orang yang suka menagih simpati, orang yang suka mintak belas kasihan, but to be honest, whatever crap that I’ve told you before, all the tears I cried, all the sorrow I felt, it has never been a part of my act, I don’t know what else to day but all I can say is ‘I tak tau macam mana lagi nak express my feelings’ when I first saw this blogpost, I was like ‘maybe its my fault, AGAIN’ but guess what, I decided not to admit that Im guilty when fact is im not, if I tak pernah nak judge you in whatever fucking thing you do, NEVER once in my life! and you’re here bitching about me with SATISFACTION then I guess the problem is in you, NOT ME.. Worst when I texted you about this, and the only thing you asked is ‘are you mad’ hahaha! You’ve done great babe, excellent job! Its freaking hard to hear the word SORRY from you, instead all you love to say is ‘I might be mean sometimes, sounds harsh huh’, I should’ve realized that a long time ago, in conclusion all I can say is, ‘you memang tak ada perasaan and you act as if you’re the only one who is perfect’ kalau tak, takde la you envy your friend who get lots of attention but not you~ Know what, Im tired of holding on to this friendship, "WHAT'S THE POINT TRYING WHEN I KEEP FAILING" I gave up, let me tell you something, ‘your words might bring me down but they aint gonna destroy me’ this all will only make me stronger, and yes! Don’t bother replying this blogpost or texting me to condemn or criticize on me anymore, I guess Im just too weak and I will only end up crying like an idiot, whatever it is, thanks for whatever you’ve done for me, I admit you’ve been such a nice friend for being there everytime I need you, but I also admit I hate you for posting this, I really do hate you now, Im disappointed, Im torn apart thinking back on how you would maybe feel annoyed everytime you see there’s an incoming text from me, a reminder to you, ‘apa yang I buat selama ni semua had never been some kind of act or drama untuk menagih simpati’ apa yang I dapat? DUIT? GOOD RESULTS IN EXAMS? GET PRETTIER? Tak kan? So buat apa I nak berlakon semua? All I ever wanted was to talk to someone about my problems, it is either you or my another friend which you know who she is.. Sometimes, without you realizing, you’re a little too judgemental sometimes, you never bother to ask yet you prefer to predict. I admit, all this kinda like make me think ‘don’t cry,she’s not worth crying for’ Babe, this is just sad but I have to say, OUR FRIENDSHIP ENDS RIGHT NOW, RIGHT HERE~ WEIRD HUH? HOW I ACTUALLY TRIED MY BEST TO HOLD ON ALL THIS WHILE AND HOW I CAN EASILY TELL YOU THAT IT HAS ALL ENDED~ “I MIGHT BE MEAN SOMETIMES”

first post for 2011~

2011-01-06T19:09:00.000+08:00

We have reached the 6th day of 2011, we have a way longer journey to go, best way is to be prepared to face more complications in life, no matter how bright the sun shines, how heavy it rains, how beautiful rainbow is after the rain, life will never be easier, its just getting more and more complicated and tough each day, so one phrase 'be prepared', we don't know what is waiting for us days ahead~ So, basically on New Year's Eve, everyone preferred to join the crowd and the jam, well I wanted too though, unfortunately my family dint want to, so its okay..i tried taking it in a positive point of view which is to be thankful as we're given one more year to live, new year ain't all about celebrations, being thankful is already enough..:) Happily, dad and mom decided to go to I-city on New Year's Day..damn, after an hour and a half being stuck in bad traffic, at last we manage to have a look at the beautiful view there, it was an awesome night~ so, today is the 6th day, as we all know that, first 6days has been treating me well, i think..so hopefully it wont turn out to be a bad year for me as 2010 was a disaster~ Im looking forward to the days ahead, hope all of you are too~ more stories to come, with love: azreena sherene~

-below, displayed few pictures of I-city, more uploaded on facebook~ :) have fun viewing~

Few more hours to a new journey~

2010-12-31T04:03:00.000+08:00

Haizz, again I am blogging in the middle of the night when my two bestfriends are already snoring..spending a night at Ray's with Fatin~ but dang, they sleepp to early la -.-
Well, basically there's not much I want to talk about, my birthday celebration went on well with the girls :), that night itself, my brother and I went out for dinner with my dad as it was his treat, too bad my mom and little brother didn't manage to tag along..received few gifts, I like the necklace, skirt and most importantly the greeting card from Anis, thanks girls..and special thanks to everyone who wished me on my birthday, whether it was through facebook or text, each wish meant a lot to me, I had a tough but fun time replying tons of birthday wishes on facebook, I somehow achieved my wish this year, not getting my dream car, but I guess its good enough, thank you God for fulfilling my most important wish on my special day, many more wishes to come~p/s: my mazda rx8 :D So around midnight, we finally get to open our presents as we were waiting for grandma to get back from church. Sadly, there are too few gifts this year, I miss being a little girl, receiving tons of cute little gifts. But its okay though, 'azreena, you need to realize, you're 18 now, not 8, hehe'.
So next morning, woke up, dressed up, on my way sending grandma to her friend's house, I met with an accident, dang! on xmas day? yes! on xmas day, car's front light was broken, the damn lorry driver was such an idiot I can say, his lorry wasn't damaged at all, and yet he asked for a hundred bucks, fine...take it and go get yourself beers, *burning mad* Sadly, I cried and cried non-stop till my eyes went swollen. :( Dad kept on persuading me, telling me its okay, nothing to be afraid of, still the incident haunts me until today and will forever do. Later that night, went over to aunt's house for Xmas dinner, I tell you...my eyes was such a disaster, you wouldn't want to see pictures of me that night. Luckily, grandma is not mad anymore. So yeah, few more hours to New Year 2011, hopefully things will go on well in 2011, leave 2010 behind if it didn't bring you joy, leave it behind. Let's ring in the new year, with good things in mind. Let go off every bad memory that brought heartache and pain, open a new book and colour it with better stories on its first chapter New Year's Day :) with love : Azreena Sherene~

18th Birthday 2010~

2010-12-23T20:54:00.000+08:00

We're looking forward to this day~

Its 23rd today, my bff Nasuha Hamzah and I will be turning 18 in just a few hours time, she's a girl I met on my first day in college during orientation, we both certainly had no idea that we will turn out to be this close, coincedentally we share the same birth dates, cool huh? she's blonde at times, yet she's cool in her own way, cua, you're awesome :) she told me she was like looking at my offer letter during the orientation, wondering whether i actually took hers, LOL~ so, here's the thing, we both seriously dont wanna grow up so soon, as 18 sounds kinda old too you see..:D I believe when we turn 18, things aint gonna be simpler but it will only get more complicated, regardless about studies, life, love life, etc..
18 is a new start when we'll start to see things differently, being 17 for a year had taught me lots of life lessons, I dont think I have to list down all of it, it had been a great year for me as May 2010 was when I started entering college and met wonderful new peoples, met cool new friends who makes me laugh whenever I frown, it showed me what college life is all about, the things we learn in class, geeezzz, it has the ability to kill each and every one of us though, recently we had just finished our Sem 2 finals, Megala said 'paper kali ni macam semua bankrupt je' haha, funny..you might not understand what she meant, she's actually saying, nampaknya macam semua paper kena re-sit je, -.- meggie, dont think that way la, we'll pass with flying colours, hopefuly..:)
So yes, Xmas this year revolves among family members only, no guests and all as its only the first month of the 2nd year since grandpa passed away, mom's in Istanbul, dad's working tomorrow night, so yeah..will be celebrating it with Cua, Anis, Iffa and maybe + Diela and Mye tomorrow <3 ..Suhana in Kemaman, to suhana 'tu la, suruh naik airplane tk nak, bawa lulu gemuk sekali, hehe', Meggie in Rawang, :( but its okay, we can celebrate it together again.. Havent heard from Raihan for quite sometime, hope I can celebrate my birthday with my 2 high-school bestfriends though, I miss seeing them..it had been so longgg..As for tomorrow, gonna make sure we have fun as we have a whole day to spend..be back soon for the next post..

p/s: I have a huge birthday wish this year, it aint about presents or such, it's the one and only wish I have in mind for this year's birthday, somehow I have no confidence in me saying it will come true..
with love: azreenasherene

Me, Cua, Suhana, Anis :)

Misanthropy!

2010-12-04T18:58:00.000+08:00

wondering... why and why I still cant move on and live a normal happy life I once had before, it had been months since everythings over but I still dont have the ability to hate someone I really really want to, is it me, my heart or my mind which dont allow me to do so? For once and for all, I am trying to tell the world, Im exhausted and I had given up a long time ago, all I need is just to get over things that had already happened and that had made my life miserable! why cant I do so? I tried taking the first step to get over it and move on, cant seem to find the right path! Life can never stop being depressing if people around me continue being ignorant, pathetic, self-centered and annoying! Sometimes, I hate myself for not being able to hate you..

Just A Dream- Nelly

2010-11-24T00:44:00.001+08:00

I was thinkin about her, thinkin about me.
Thinkin about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream.
So I travel back, down that road.
Who she come back? No one knows.
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream.

I was at the top and I was like I’m at the basement.
Number one spot and now she found her a replacement.
I swear now I can't take it, knowing somebody's got my baby.
And now you ain't around, baby I can't think.
Shoulda put it down. Shoulda got that ring.
Cuz I can still feel it in the air.
See her pretty face run my fingers through her hair.

My lover, my life. My shorty, my wife.
She left me, I'm tied.
Cuz I knew that it just ain't right.

I was thinkin about her, thinkin about me.
Thinkin about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream.
So I travel back, down that road.
Who she come back? No one knows.
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream.

When I be ridin man I swear I see her face at every turn.
Tryin to get my usher over, I can let it burn.
And I just hope she notice she the only one I yearn for.
Oh I miss her when will I learn?

Didn't give her all my love, I guess now I got my payback.
Now I'm in the club thinkin all about my baby.

Hey, she was so easy to love. But wait, I guess that love wasn't enough.

I'm goin through it every time that I'm alone.
And now i'm missin, wishin she'd pick up the phone.
But she made a decision that she wanted to move one.
Cuz I was wrong.

And I was thinkin about her, thinkin about me.
Thinkin about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream.
So I travel back, down that road.
Who she come back? No one knows.
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream.

If you ever loved somebody put your hands up.
If you ever loved somebody put your hands up.
And now they're gone and you wish you could give them everything.
I said, if you ever loved somebody put your hands up.
If you ever loved somebody put your hands up.
And now they're gone and you wish you could give them everything.

I was thinkin about her, thinkin about me.
Thinkin about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream.
So I travel back, down that road.
Who she come back? No one knows.
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream.

And I was thinkin about her, thinkin about me.
Thinkin about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream.
So I travel back, down that road.
Who she come back? No one knows.
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream.

I effing love this song and I dont know why, maybe it is because I can play it well by guitar, the intro is awesome no idea on why my friend iffa dislikes and likes this song at the same time, :)

One In A Million- Ne-Yo~

2010-11-24T00:39:00.001+08:00

Jet setter
Go getter
Nothing better
Call me Mr. been there done that
Top model chick to your every day hood rat
Less than all but more than a few
But I've never met one like you

Been all over the world
Done a little bit of everything
Little bit of everywhere
With a little bit of everyone
All the girls I've been with
Things I've seen it takes much to impress
But sure enough you go it makes your soul stand up from all the rest

I can be in love
But I just don't know
Baby one thing is for certain
Whatever you do it's working
All the girls don't matter
In your presence can't do what you do
There's a million girls around but I don't see no one but you

Girl you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had
And I'm certain that
There ain't nothing better
No there ain't nothing better than this

You're not a regular girl
You don't give a damn about your look
Talking about I can't do it for you
But you can do it for yourself
Even though that ain't so
Baby cause my dough don't know how to end
But that independent thing I'm with it
All we do is win baby

I could be in love
But I just don't know
Baby one thing is for certain

Whatever you do it's working
All the girls don't matter
In your presence can't do what you do
There's a million girls around but I don't see no one but you

Baby you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had
And I'm certain that
There ain't nothing better
No there ain't nothing better than this
Girl you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had
And I'm certain that
There ain't nothing better
No there ain't nothing better than this

Timing girl
Only one in the world
Just one of a kind
She mine

Ooh all that I can think about is what this thing could be
A future baby
Baby you're one of a kind
That means that you're the only one for me
Only one for me
Baby (girl) you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had
And I'm certain that
There ain't nothing better
No there ain't nothing better than this
Girl you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had
And I'm certain that
There ain't nothing better
No there ain't nothing better than this

This is one of my current addiction, how I wish one day, my prince charming will tell me Im one in a million, <3 LOL! sounds so pathetic, not too soon~ Later :) When it becomes a combination like birds and the sky~

Limited time to have unlimited fun~

2010-11-24T00:21:00.000+08:00

Done with Academic English's sketch presentation, coursework part 2 and Economics quiz, mana ada pening gila nak fikir thesis statement for the whatever Argumentative Essay, luckily we were given a chance to discuss, sat beside Suhana nanuna aka lulu cantik, lakk lahh :P enjoyed being a translator, it feels like my essay writing is nothing but accompanied by the word 'lame' , from a total of at least thousand words, decreasing to 500++ only, probably it's because I dont practice reading anymore, Im getting weaker in writing :( again, it is coming, the day where earth stood still for all Fic and Fis' students, our finals for semester 2, now I realise how fast time passes by, the moment when you start to realise something when its about to end already, havent been studying much this sem, regrets is for sure, wondering how long more am I gonna be this lazy, LOL! *mana ada cakap macam tak belajar langsung* rightt, to some readers, you might not get what that sentence means, its a way of my friends and I to be sarcastic, LOL! pathetic much huh? :D
To be honest, I am not in the study mood this sem, same as my bestfriend fatin, we're both looking forward to Xmas since we're celebrating our sweet 18 on 24th and 25th Dec this year, not to be forgotten, cua gendut as well, still thinking, celebrating it at home with family, follow mom somewhere or celebrate with the girls, *dilemma* haizz~ Dad's birthday is just around the corner, gonna try to make it a great surprise this year, will figure out something~ So yes, finals AGAIN! sakit hati bila fikir pasal ni, every single thing in life is getting tougher and more complicated each day, it never ends~ Due to bad depression, again I injured my hand by doing something really bad, some of my friends already know about it, this is what I always do when I cant find the right way to handle stress well, yes it hurts but to be honest, when doing it, I feel nothing as in Im numb or something, my left hand, plastered as the injuries was kinda bad, not to worry, Im not dead, just yet..matters to think of in the mean time, freaking freaky finals, bored and tired of listening and mentioning this, 'will make sure I score better this time' :) Xmas shopping, new guitar, new cellphone, blablabla~ Sorry if you find my posts dull, I am just not a good blogger i guess~ With love : ASH~

You Be the Anchor That Keeps My Feet On the Ground, I'll Be the Wings That Keep Your Heart In the Clouds :)

2010-11-12T14:26:00.000+08:00

And honestly, I have been begging for answers
That you and only you can give to me
A voice crying loud
I've been crying for days now
And as I start to run, I stop to breathe
(And I was nearly scared to death)
And I was nearly scared to death
(What you left in paragraphs)
What you left in paragraphs
(The words were nearly over us)
The words were nearly over us
You stop and turn and grab your bags

And I'll be here by the ocean
Just waiting for proof that there's sunsets and silhouette dreams
All my sand castles fall like the ashes of cigarettes
And every wave drags me to sea
I could stand here for hours
Just to ask God the question, "Is everyone here make-believe?"
With a tear in His voice, He said, "Son, that's the question."
Does this deafening silence mean nothing to no one but me?

As hours move to minutes
And minutes take longer to break
I will be desperately awaiting
But my tongue won't fall apart
And we've been sitting here for hours
All alone and in the dark

So let me think of to word it
Is it too soon to say 'perfect'?
If I could find another thirty minutes somewhere
I'm sure everything would find me
All that's left is just to sing

And I'll be here by the ocean
Just waiting for proof that there's sunsets and silhouette dreams
All my sand castles fall like the ashes of cigarettes
And every wave drags me to sea
I could stand here for hours
Just to ask God the question, "Is everyone here make-believe?"
With a tear in His voice, He said, "Son, that's the question."
Does this deafening silence mean nothing to no one but me?

If you'll sing to me sweet until then,
I may never sail Virginia again
And as this current moves slow for me
This much you must know of me again
And I'll have you know I'm scared to death

Tell me once again
That you'll love me to the death
And should I die, you swear that you will come for me
As I fade away, you reach out your hand
(And please don't let me go)
And please don't let me go
(And please don't let me go)
And please don't let me go

And I'll be here by the ocean
Just waiting for proof that there's sunsets and silhouette dreams
All my sand castles fall like the ashes of cigarettes
And every wave drags me to sea
I could stand here for hours
Just to ask God the question, "Is everyone here make-believe?"
With a tear in His voice, He said, "Son, that's the question."
Does this deafening silence mean nothing to no one but me?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rhN7SG-H-3k

First heard this song from nanuna_suhana's phone, set as her ringtone, like it very-very much :)

RandoM~

2010-11-12T14:19:00.001+08:00

Another crappy post, had been sick for 5days, I sound like crap now, on Monday, believe it or not, I was freezing to death till I decided to sit under the table in class, sejuk kot..felt like dying already, high fever, sorethroat, flu, cough, -.- went home early that day, did not attend classes on Tuesday, I feel like I've missed out quite a number of classes this semester, :( did not join the girls for movie on Wednesday, Thursday which was yesterday, best night, slept over in Segi, had many things on :) cat-walked like a nyahh, haha! to those yang tak faham, it's okay la, the girls just seem to love my voice, kan Suhana? LOL! Trust me, I sound like crap, hahaha~ nyahhh..Watched the whole episode of 1 Litre of Tears on suhana's lappie, tahan mata until 4.30 am baru boleh tidur, aiyoo.. overall, it was a great night, best night ever, anis balik, sedih :( I will never forget 11th November 2010 + a part of 12th November 2010 :)

Came home at 11++, surf the net, facebook, youtube, twitter, tumblr and here I am, blogging..

p/s: imhungry&imissdad, :( having nasi kandar for lunch shortly, yeay!

Later, need to draft the whole piece of script for AE's presentation on tuesday, and I really2 need to study, exam is just around the corner, when Im done with exams this December, I can have fun on my birthday, cuacuppy's and FnH's birthday + Xmas <3

Probably this is gonna be my last exam in Segi, back then, I had thousands of reason to stay back, now it is only my friends that's left, and I think changing college is the best for me, pretty much gonna be true this time, in that case, it aint gonna be a trouble for anyone anymore, *teared* I am gonna miss everything and everyone here, unfortunately, I am left with no choice, plus mom and dad are also shifing by end of this year, probably gonna be very busy. In the mean time, I just need to focus on my coming exam and see what will happen after that, Girls! I am so gonna miss all of you, so much :(

Guess Im done for now, happy reading ;)

Love The Way You Lie part 2~

2010-11-07T10:55:00.001+08:00

On the first page of our story, the future seems so bright.
And this thing turned out so evil, I don’t know why I’m still surprised.
Even angels have their wicked schemes and you take death to new extremes.
But you’ll always be my hero, even though you lost your mind.

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn,
But that’s alright because I like the way it hurts.
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry,
But that’s alright because I love the way you lie, I love the way you lie.
I love the way you lie.

Now this gravel in our voices, glass is shattered from the fight.
In this tug of war, you’ll always win, even when I’m right.
Cause you feed me fables from your hand,
With violet words and empty threats and it’s sick that all these battles are what keeps me satisfied.

So maybe I’m a masochist
I try to run but I don’t wanna ever leave.
Til the walls are goin’ up in smoke with all our memories.

[Eminem]
This morning, you wake, a sunray hits your face
smeared makeup as we lay in the wake of destruction
hush baby, speak softly, tell me I’ll be sorry that you
pushed me into the coffee table last night so I can push you off me
try and touch me so I can scream at you not to touch me
run out the room and I’ll follow you like a lost puppy
baby, without you, I’m nothing, I’m so lost, hug me
then tell me how ugly I am, but that you’ll always love me
then after that, shove me, in the aftermath of the
destructive path that we’re on, two psychopaths but we
know that no matter how many knives we put in each other’s backs
that we’ll have each other’s backs, ’cause we’re that lucky
together, we move mountains, let’s not make mountains out of molehills,
you hit me twice, yeah, but who’s countin’
I may have hit you three times, I’m startin’ to lose count
but together, we’ll live forever, we found the youth fountain
our love is crazy, we’re nuts, but I refused counselin’
this house is too huge, if you move out I’ll burn all two thousand
square feet of it to the ground, ain’t shit you can do about it
with you I’m in my f–kin’ mind, without you, I’m out it

I love this version so much, so much until I decided to put in on my blog, its just too awesome~ :)To those of you who has not listen to this song, please do so~ I know you'll love it..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfdlYRiAcLU

Im just plain stupid~

2010-11-04T00:44:00.000+08:00

How I wish I can have the guts to tell you how much I miss you~

I just cant resist it, I've tried, tried to be strong, act cool as if nothing happened, the truth is I cant, I pray every moment, hoping that you'll realize one day, but I know, that one day for you to realize is totally impossible, blame me, curse, insult, humiliate, do whatever you want to, I just couldnt be bothered anymore, it's my life, my blogsite, to anyone who feels like condemning or criticising me, feel free to do so, before that, try putting yourself into my shoes and you'll know what you will do, obviously worst than this, probably you would even kill yourself, why bother what people would think, in life, there is a word called Freedom, that's it~

I just wanna say, I miss you~

This is some kind of embarassment, yes I know that very well, the fact is, I just dont care..

FmL! for the very first time, I am saying this! Can I be anymore stupid? Let go azreena, let go!! You have a million reasons to let go, not even one for you to hold on.

Dead, Dead, Dead~

2010-11-03T19:22:00.000+08:00

I dont know what is gonna happen to AE's assignment this time, for the very first time, I aint working with my normal team mates, I am now working with a group of chinese girls, yes it isnt hard to communicate, language isnt a big thing, thing is I seriously have no idea on whether this is going too work out, drama presentation on Ngo thing is not easy, tomorrow mostly everyone leaving for their hometown, yes we have saturdays and sundays, but who would care to go to college just to have discussion on this, we have limited time left, Im pissed off, really! On monday, one of my group members couldnt attend classes, presentation is on tuesday, so WTF! I did do some research on this thing, and found kind of like useful infos, told them to read the story about it, yet they can ask me again, 'what's that link' about without even clicking on it first, I cried when I think of this, this is too presurring, if they still continue being ignorant, our grades will surely drop, I dont wanna get a B, C, D, I want my grade A to remain, ohh God, please help me :(

I cant write the script if they come up with nothing, havent think of props yet, Im dead this time, dead!

Friends~

2010-11-02T20:40:00.000+08:00

I dont choose my friends, I be friends with whoever I think is kind

I dont care who they are, where they from, etc as human beings are all the same, no one is perfect

I dont bitch my friends behind their back, I wouldnt ditch them for no reason

I am who I am when I am with my friends

I give all my heart in being friends with my friends, no bad feelings, hate, nothing

I dont curse my friends

I accept them for who they are

A friend is someone who you can rely on no matter what condition you're in, unfortunately if a friend is bitching you without you kowing it, she/he just isnt the right friend for you to be with..

Bitching me behind my back will not make you any richer, prettier or even smarter, only you!

Someday, a person like this just have to realize how to be more polite, not only to her friends, family but others as well~

Cooler than me~

2010-11-02T16:02:00.000+08:00

If I could write you a song,
and make you fall in love,
I would already have you up under my arm.
I used to pull all my tricks,
I hope that you like this.
but you probably won't,
you think you're cooler than me.

you got designer shades,
just to hide your face and
you wear them around like
you're cooler than me.
and you never say hey,
or remember my name.
its probably cuz,
you think you're cooler than me.

you got your hot crowd,
shoes on your feet,
and you wear them around,
like they ain't shit.
but you don't know,
the way that you look,
when your steps
make
that
much
noise.

see I got you,
all figured out,
you need everyone's eyes just to feel seen.
girl, your so vain,
you probably think that this song is about you.
don't you? don't you?

if I could write you a song,
and make you fall in love,
I would already have you up under my arm.
I used to pull all my tricks,
I hope that you like this.
but you probably won't,
you think you're cooler than me.

you got designer shades,
just to hide your face and
you wear them around like,
you're cooler than me.
and you never say hey,
or remember my name.
it's probably cuz,
you think you're cooler than me.

you got your hot crowd,
switching your walk,
and you don't even look when you pass by.
but you don't know,
the way that you look.
when your steps make
that
much
noise.

and don't you dare act like you don't know,
know what's up,
cuz your nose is up.
I'm approaching up.
like I can't give you winter in the summer
or summer in the winter
Miami in December
trying to look bored in them Dior's.
she probably is,
Was acting shallow 'til she found out
how deep that my pockets is
Mrs. pre-Madonna, this is your reminder
That I think you're fine, but I'm finer

'Cause it sure seems
('Cause it sure seems)
You got no doubt
(That you got no doubt)
But we all see
(We all see)
You got your head in the clouds
(Clouds)

if I could write you a song,
and make you fall in love,
I would already have you up under my arm.
I used to pull all my tricks,
I hope that you like this.
but you probably won't,
you think you're cooler than me.

you got designer shades,
just to hide your face and
you wear them around like,
you're cooler than me.
and you never say hey,
or remember my name.
its probably cuz,
you think you're cooler than me.

The girls and I loves to sing this whenever we feel like singing, and to Fatin: M Daud Kilau huh, LOL~

This song is not too bad though although at first, I dint quite like it~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqWq_48LxWQ&ob=av3e

need no caption~

2010-11-02T13:02:00.000+08:00

we know who fake a friendship.

we know who appreciate a friendship.

ignore those stupid pathetic human who choose to fake it..and pay more on those who really see what friendship really means..when u r with true friends controversy lessen ,loves bloom...

YoU~

2010-10-31T20:37:00.002+08:00

1. When I fall asleep, I wanna see you in my dreams~
2. When I drive, I wish to see your car next to mine~
3. When I eat, I wish you could feed me~
4. When I drink, I would like to share one straw with you~
5. When I'm tired, I want you to be right by my side, comforting me~
6. When I'm sad, I want you to cheer me up~
7. When I'm hungry, I want you to drive me out to eat~
9. When I'm doing nothing, I want you to coincidently give me a text or a call~
10. When I hit the sack, I want you to put me to sleep~

11. When I need hope, I want you to convince me and show me there is hope~
12. When I miss you, I want you to appear right in front of my door step~

~Basically, I just want you to be here with me~

~the picture is what i found from a website, besides that, someone's blog site inspired me in writing this, I just copy, paste, and yes, to be honest, I re-edited some parts~

Exact plagiarism is not allowed isnt it? :D

So yeah, shut up and just read

Strictly not for stalkers~

Perfect Nightmare~

2010-10-29T18:24:00.002+08:00

Sometimes we fight
Sometimes I cry
Why don't I
Just tell him goodbye
Sometimes I should
But sometimes I don't
Build up the strength to
Say that it's wrong
Sometimes I hate
Sometimes I love
Sometimes I hurt
Sometimes I don't
Sometimes I wait
For him to change
But it's okay
I've disguised the pain
And I don't ever wanna leave him alone
They say i'm brainwashed but i'm in love
With this man
Yeah

Keep telling myself that it's not worth it
I already know I don't deserve it
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
So when will I wake up and scream
No way (x7)
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
Perfect nightmare

Sometimes I keep my cool
Sometimes I let him know
Sometimes I even pack my bags to walk out the door
Sometimes I feel safe
Sometimes I really don't
Sometimes I promise that i'm ready to let him go
But I don't ever wanna leave him alone
They say i'm brainwashed but i'm in love
With this man

Ohh ohhh

Keep telling myself that it's not worth it
I already know I don't deserve it
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
So when will I wake up and scream
No way (x7)
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
Perfect nightmare

Hoping he's changing
But i'm scared he's not
Can't see a way to leave
Help me open my eyes

Keep telling myself that it's not worth it
I already know I don't deserve it
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
Perfect

Keep telling myself that it's not worth it
I already know I don't deserve it
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
So when will I wake up and scream
No way (x7)
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
Perfect nightmare
No way (x7)
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
Perfect nightmare
Perfect nightmare

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ZYRgehIIVg&ob=av3e

September :) a song that can make me cry~

2010-10-27T13:15:00.000+08:00

How the time passed away, all the trouble that we gave
And all those days we spent out by the lake
Has it all gone to waste? All the promises we made
One by one they vanish just the same

Of all the things I still remember
Summer's never looked the same
The years go by and time just seems to fly
But the memories remain

In the middle of September we'd still play out in the rain
Nothing to lose but everything to gain
Reflecting now on how things could've been
It was worth it in the end

Now it all seems so clear, there's nothing left to fear
So we made our way by finding what was real
Now the days are so long that summer's moving on
We reach for something that's already gone, yeah

Of all the things I still remember
Summer's never looked the same
The years go by and time just seems to fly
But the memories remain

In the middle of September we'd still play out in the rain
Nothing to lose but everything to gain
Reflecting now on how things could've been
It was worth it in the end

We knew we had to leave this town
But we never knew when and we never knew how
We would end up here the way we are
Yeah, we knew we had to leave this town
But we never knew when and we never knew how

Of all the things I still remember
Summer's never looked the same
The years go by and time just seems to fly
But the memories remain

In the middle of September we'd still play out in the rain
Nothing to lose but everything to gain
Reflecting now on how things could've been
It was worth it in the end

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJzBcKM3ZIE

Not in sequence~

2010-10-27T12:50:00.001+08:00

So hey people, thanks to all who asked about when's my new post gonna be up, especially Suhana, 'tanggachi dah update blog ni' haha! It had been 22 days since my last post, unbelievable, so reason being is, had been busy with college, assignments, laptop charger died, and the main reason is, I'm lazy actually, for the past few weeks, I only wrote everything in my diary :) And yes, blog title is enough to show what this post is all about, I just write according to what I think. 19th October was the best, memorable experience, did not plan to go for Paramore, made up mind last minute, found tickets on Facebook's event page, went with my cousin..unfortunately, when we arrived, it was already last two songs, LOL! Luckily my other friends did not come to the stadium or else it would only waste their time, Brick by Boring Brick, and Misery Business was it, but it was okay I thought, at least I get to see them performing live on stage, and yeah! Hayley's awesome hair! Love it :) On the same day itself, I missed out 3classes, Accounting, Academic English & Economics as in the morning, my mom and I wanted to head to KLIA for her appointment and then to get our new house keys in Nilai, due to high-confidence level, without using Gps, we lost our way as we were from Ampang and we went all the way until Port Klang, the road there is kind of creepy, heee~ So, thats it for 19th October..

Next about Battle of The Bands by Celcom, this is another crap, we planned to take part in this so badly, due to some problems, we didnt manage to, sadly dissapointed..but I'll make sure we're gonna take part in the next band competition. Halloween party @Segi Uc, Kota Damansara, my girls are going, hope they'll have loads of fun on that coming night. When I'm busy updating this, they're out in KL, looking for Halloween costumes, right Suhana, Cua? heheh~

Dreams, I had been having continuous dreams lately, and always it is the same person appearing in my dreams, it is not that I've been thinking too much, honestly I did not think about it, I made myself not to think about it, thing is, it comes uninvitedly, a friend of mine once said, If you see someone in your dreams, that means the person wants to see you, haha! right.. It made me think, probably life would be much easier if we dont have dreams when we sleep..and to the person who always appear in my dreams, i would like to say this "though you dont see me updating, that doesnt mean I've stopped thinking", I admit, there are times when I think back on whatever happened before, sweet memories, sad ones, all mashed up, I just have to stop thinking, as Fatin said, "dont always hold on, because in all reality, sometimes you need to let go" & "sometimes you just have to stop caring, turn off all emotion and feeling, simply to protect yourself from getting hurt" a word I can say is only thanks..:) I've promised myself to try my best to get over whatever happened, let bygones be bygones. There aint any benefit even if I keep thinking or trying. In life, shit happens, an that is what actually makes people stronger.

College life, it is irritating sometimes, especially when you have a hypocrite, backstabber, most important, an annoying uncle under the same roof, studying together, all he knows is only backstabbing people, including 'lecturer sekalian alam': by suhana, haha! I seriously had no idea you would do such thing, editing his picture in such a bad way, one thing I can say is 'padan muka'! urghh..In class, I accidentally raised my voice at him, a single kind of harsh word came out, that made him keep silence, am I mean? My girls 'terkejut sekejap' as I had never say bad words to anyone before, kiranya innocent la, yeahh right :P too bad for that uncle, he just dont realise how much people actually dislike him! HELL pathetic! So that was the very first time a so-called harsh word slipped out of my mouth, but I think it was alright for someone like him, I think I should change my phrase 'kesian dia' to 'padan muka' LOL! 'jahat gila' :P Next, Accounting assignment, again error occured, first video done was completely perfect enough, unfortunately it cant be played through WMP, so re-edited it again last minute, special thanks to my team mates, Suhana, Anis, Nasuha, Iffa for making the thing work, and we manged to submit it on time..thank god~ AE drama presentation, still thinking whether it is gonna work as for the very first time, I aint working with the girls, as I gave in to a new girl in class, for no reason actually, but its okay I think..Hopefuly my new group members will co-operate to make the best out of it. Besides that, it is all fine and going on well, in class, all we do is laugh together, especially when lecturer likes our group, haha, she names us with animal names, but we're not offended though, Megala has a new name now, Chicken..Suhana chicken no.2, and why in the world she called me a duck, LOL! funny Ms.Ooi..she's fun! Lesson learned, 'dont eat chicken before entering class, nanti jadi hyper macam megala'. However, whenever we feel bored in class, we certainly have no idea what to do, if we dont write crap, we draw lulu & tiktik which becomes lutik, hahaha! Its kinda inappopriate to list which class is boring, fact is, 'memang ada pun'. I like it when the whole class laugh out loud together, its fun! Hate is whenever i Sneeze, there will be someone who immitates me, -.-! haha!

Guitar, string 'putus' lagi, high time to change it already before great grandma's 90th birthday as we're asked to perform. Right now my baby is @Venus..I do miss it though, but at least my girls can play it, one is trying on your call and the other trying on breakaway, good luck! :) I wanna try on top songs on my mind now, like Beggin', I Like That, Club Cant Handle Me, my girls and I just love singing these songs!..Besides that, latest ones managed to be played, The Truth: Kris Allen, Run: Snow Patrol, and my Favourite September by Daughtry.. awesomee! I love this song so much.

'Suhana, apa lagi nak update?' haha, blank already, penuh sangat, I guess that is all for now, happy reading, :) Will keep all of you updated, and not leaving my blog outdated again after this..

With love: Azreena Sherene~

Below, few pictures for this post..these are pictures taken during the process of completing our assignment~

~The End~

The truth~

2010-10-05T03:46:00.000+08:00

I am tired, I cant handle this anymore, I am tired of faking smiles, my laughters, they are barely true ones, I smile & laugh just for the sake of showing people I am fine, I wish I could scream out loud and say people! I am not alright, cant you see that? I cry, yes almost every night, an individual does not need any specific reason to cry, and I believe most people cry themselves to sleep because that is the one and only moment when you feel you're alone and no one is with you, there aint other ways to express your pain, the suffering, not everything can be explained and shared with others, best way is to cry your heart out loud, go to bed, wake up the next morning, live a normal life, this happens repeatedly, there is never gonna be any ending, thats Life~ I wish I could run away from evrything, everyone, be alone somewhere no one can ever find me, for a second, or maybe years, and when I return, I will have the courage tell people I am alright when I really mean it, I wish I can keep myself away from thinking too much about things which does not bring any benefit to me, I wish I can live my life happily, there's just too many wishes, but none of it can come true, I am sick and tired, I had been wasting too much time thinking and thinking non-stop, I think too much till I cant be able to sleep..

I am tired of crying everytime I think, 'all people want is someone to listen' I dont want people to listen, at least use their senses to feel what I am feeling, :'( I dont need people's sympathy, not at all, I guess I might just have to go on, remain silence, leave it all unknown, but how longer more can I take it? I wanna run away from life, be alone, stop talking, stop trying to show me how happy you are, I dont give a shit about it! Yes, I am currently going through hard times but who cares, I am strong and that is why I made it until today~

I want to be alone!

It's either stopping or not~

2010-09-28T01:12:00.002+08:00

My friends are pretty much on my side, they feel sorry, they feel that it's something really stupid, they feel that this isn't fair, they feel bad for what happened, all they want is just for me to really write about people who made my life miserable, expose all the bad side of a person so the world will be able to know who's the winner and who's the loser, they want me to express all my anger that I've been keeping inside, but to be honest, I just dont have the heart to do that, better still, they want me to move on happily, before this, they laugh out loud whenever they hear my jokes probably it is because I was thinking less about everything, nothing really bothered my mind, I realised what people often say is just too good to be true, 'the past will keep on haunting you until the day you can really let go and get over it', but you know what, I am trying to tell everyone this F**king statement!!

Every single thing in life needs TIME!!
So stop thinking as if I am not alright!!

It is hard for me to accept the fact when people thinks that everything I write is related to them, I dont have the freedom to express anymore, back then it was way easier, I can write, express, be mad and curse all I like, however now, whatever I try to express is always mistaken by people, I guess only my family and close friends understands exactly what I am trying to do, life isn't all about that specific someone or something, in life, people express what they feel generally, all the time, unfortunately some people just dont seem to understand that fact, it makes me wonder, why?

When are people like this going to stop bothering my life, I want my freedom back, I dont need you people's sympathy or I dont need you saying 'pity you', people like this should at least pity themselves first before they even humiliate others, sometimes you just have to use all your senses to feel what others are feeling, try putting yourself into their shoes, if you feel nothing, sorry to say, maybe you are just heartless, so from now on, I would just listen to advises and opinions which I think is acceptable, and care less about whatever people wanna say or think about what I do, how I look, who am I, LOL I am not Spiderman for sure, I just wanna tell you this, say whetevr you want to, take your time and think whatever you want to, I wasn't born in this world only to please people and be kind all the time, and all I want people like this to know is

So people out there, I am begging you sincerely to stop thinking whatever I do is related to you people, everything in life is in general, I've never stated any names, age, sex, location, life history and all, so please stop being so self-obsessed, if people still cant change their ways of thinking, then Im sorry, but it's just too bad, go ahead with that.

It goes on~

2010-09-27T02:38:00.001+08:00

First of all, few days back, nothing much happened, it made me think awhile on what to blog, it has come to and end where I finally realise there aint no point trying too hard on anything anymore, people around me often reminds me, 'you should stop being too kind to everyone', and they always say this, 'azreena, tu la, you ni suka sangat kesian kat orang' and also 'you and your kesian' haha, by nasuha hamzah :) I always reply them with, 'takpe la, at least if we kesian kat orang sekarang, we will get something good in return' unfortunately I made a mistake, I trust people easily, cared too much about others, I realised I must make a change, things are getting more complicated each day, and if people can live happily, why cant I? Bad past, difficulty and obstacles in life taught me on how to be a stronger person, 'December girls are strong', I must believe in that, I still have a long way to go, God is fair enough to give everyone the happiness they're suppossed to get one day, specially dedicated to cua and fatin hafizah, cua: bad experience in life is what enables you to be a stronger person, everyone has got frowning times and problems in life, it's up to you to deal with it by using the best way, no matter what happens, life goes on.. :) fatin: your dream guy is somewhere out there, he will come to you when the time is right, be patient my dear, so basically, it has come to and end, I had enough trying, I want my happy life back, seriously, and I believe I'll be alright, everyone thinks I deserve better, all I can do is pray hard to God~ He'll show me the path to happiness ;) all that happened shall remain as a memory and should be treasured, without hate and grudge, all human beings can be able to move on well with their lives, not to be forgotten, God is fair and He knows exactly what his followers are going through and will reward them with something better in life.

and it goes on and on and on, yeah life goes on..

Guitar~

2010-09-23T03:23:00.002+08:00

My grandpa's guitar was what inspired me to start playing guitar, now that he's no more with us, his guitar belongs to all of his grandchildren~ R.I.P grandpa, we miss you, a lot~

When Im bored, sad, or whenever I feel like crying, I play my guitar, this is the only way to keep me away from thinking, many times few friends asked me whether I wanna join their band, doing guitar or vocals, but I refused, seriously, I play and sing only for fun, :) I even play my guitar in the middle of the night, and after a few minutes, I'll receive a text from my dad saying 'its late, slow sikit' then I'll stop straight away, haha~ sorry, Im just too bored, dont know what to do, so basically there are few songs which I had already mastered, thanks to my brother Hiqmal who first taught me how to start by playing your call, same goes to two of my cousins, Natasha and Brandon, I can say all four of us share the same interest when it comes to music, thanks to my aunt for bringing me to 1Utama to get my guitar and my golden capo which cost me Rm20~ Although its not that expensive, my guitar is still one of my most precious asset, if possible I would like to carry it along with me wherever I go~ I dont go for guitar classes, planned to but got called up for national service, when I got out from camp, it was already time for me to start studies and college took place~ So I tried my best to learn it by myself and finally I can at least play well now~ List..

Your Call, Fall For You, Something More: Secondhand Serenade
Zombie: The Cranberries
Happy Birthday song
In His Time: Church Song
Flightless Bird: Iron & Wine
The Glass Parade: Cary Brothers
Impossible: Shontelle
Resistance: Muse ( my favourite song and also a song that had influenced me to learn drums )
Use Somebody: Kings of Leon
Most songs by Taylor Swift and Kelly Clarkson
All The Right Moves, Secrets, Apologize by One Republic
Almost Lover: A Fine Frenzy
Hey Soul Sister: Train
Im yours: Jason Mraz
Iris: Goo Goo Dolls
Numb: Linkin Park
Need You Now: Lady Antebellum
You and Me, Whatever It Takes: Lifehouse
Broken Wings: Alter Bridge
Love The Way You Lie: Eminem & Rihanna
Your Guardian Angel: The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
Russian Roulette, Unfaithful, Cry: Rihanna
Dynamite: Taio Cruz
Wait For You: Elliot Yamin
When I Look At You : Miley Cyrus
We'll Be A Dream: We The Kings & Demi Lovato
The Truth: Kris Allen
Life After You: Daughtry
Setting Up Sunday: Meg&Dia

Basically, these are the songs that I had already mastered, somehow I think there are many more to be listed, due to sleepiness, I cant really think right now, I am not a professional guitarist, I dont have great vocals, I play when you give me the chords and I ignore the chords when I get to memorized it, however I have a dream to become a professional guitarist and start up my own band someday, let's just hope that my dream will come true, though I am not a professional yet, I believe practice makes perfect, not to be forgotten, Fatin who also shares the same interest, babe, one day I will not be the one teaching you anymore, we'll be professionals~ :)

When I was better, I decided to get my own guitar, and the next one for my birthday this year will be my new Electric Guitar :)

Quotes~

2010-09-22T19:09:00.000+08:00

“To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing”..
“In love, it is better to know and be disappointed, than to not know and always wonder”..
''It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is most painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let the person know how you feel''..
''Don't only be close with someone who makes you HAPPY ,be close with someone who CAN'T be happy without you. It makes a lot of difference in life''..

Too Bad~

2010-09-22T03:55:00.002+08:00

Back then, there were times when someone often tells me Im behaving and acting in a very sarcastic way when Im not, I might not realise that, but seriously, every single word I said was not sarcasm, sometimes people like this just have to learn how to live in the world of reality, not fantasy and not only thinking about what themselves, trust me, being self-centered will lead you to nowhere but back to basics, and will only make more people dislike you someday, you'll get what you deserve to one day~ Yeah, lately Im being very sarcastic and mean, especially when it comes to flashing back about anyone I dislike, like I mentioned, I dont dislike or hate people for no reason, but I guess Im just too tired of being kind to everyone when at the end of the day, I gain nothing~ :) I thank God for having people that still appreciates me, not one, not two, not three, but uncountable :)

You deserve this~

conversation~

2010-09-22T02:47:00.001+08:00

A friend of mine said,,

being in love has no ending~

Me:

being in love sucks, like seriously, its better to stay single and have fun flirting around while u still can :)

Friend:

of cause there will be problems..but me being single and having fun days must come to an end la..no point walking on the mall seeing couple molesting each other than you walking solo when you know you deserve someone that cares and is special for you with your ability

Me:

hey, hey..u still have a long way to go, now's the time to enjoy yrself first, without any commitment, there is a girl for u out there, who is perfectly meant to be with you, when time comes u will get to have that happiness that evryone had been longing for, remember, we're still young, and over-thinking abt matter like this will not lead us anywhere but causes stress and depression~

Friend:

but since im already committed with her i have to take my responsibility ma..have to endure all kinds if funny and complicated problem..but just hope every mistake we do is a lesson for our relationship in future la..

Me:

yes, u got the right point, 'forget what hurt you before but never forget what it taught you' :)
so2, if u really love that girl, i dont know who, just do whatever it takes to remain together, until a point when u really think there is no ho...pe, then u may give up and move on :)
and arron! most important thing, dont hurt a girl's feelings cause thats the worst thing to do in life~

Friend:

lol.."i dont know who it seems"..yea..no la.im not that heartbreaker kind..if i got intention to hurt her its better for me not to proceed in a relationship with her ryte since im determine to start a new beginning with someone i can rely on..but the thing is..i understand what kinda shit girls have to face in past..why must they constantly say it out as if the incident before will haunt them..if they are still not over from the past..than why start a relationship?

Me:

haha, wait! do i know this person ure talking about man? :D
ohh wow, impressive! ure not the heartbreaker kind? well thats a very good news :)
tell u what, i understand truly how a girl feels for sure because im not a guy, LOL~
a bad and dark ...past will keep on haunting someone, and u know that very well right? maybe yr dream girl just need time to heal, the process of healing is so not easy, so if u really do love her, prove to her in anyway, the reason why they think its okay to start a new relationship is because they think they can get over the past, but one day they will realise, and they might think its a stupid thing to do and bla bla bla, there goes the time when they'll tell u they're not ready for a new relationship, sometimes things happen, yes for a reason, so like it or not, terima je la, i guess thats an obvious fact of life~

Friend:

now that sounds dam scary..looks like i have to discuss and find ways la..ya..time..i've been through that many times..and at the end,the time wont come..all that comes is an unexpected dilemma and depression which causes a huge physiological breakdown..im sure thats a way to fix stuff..just need to ask and find ideas..

Me:

yes, exactly, things can always be fixed if and only you want to make it better and not looking for excuses and all :)

Conclusion of the story is, if we keep on thinking about this, we'll end up suffering from depression, whats the point? think about it.. to that friend of mine, rememeber, we are still young, there are still way too many things to explore in this world, next is, dont start something if you feel like you're going to end it in a bad way, people's feelings matters, hurting someone else will not make your life better, so yeah, to a friend of mine who had this conversation with me, stay strong, as in life, we tend to face craps every single moment, and if we're smart enough, we will have the best way to deal with it, :) XoXo~

A Day Out for Step-Up, Anis & Forever21, Azreena & Car~

2010-09-22T02:32:00.001+08:00

Class today or I may say yesterday, 21st September 2010, started at 9am with Accounting2 leading the day, so surprisingly Academic English was canceled, nothing else to do, went out with the girls, Meg, Iffa and a few others didn't wanna join, so it was only Anis, Cua, Suhana and myself, we headed to 1Utama, Curve is not really our thing, duhh~ watched Step-Up 3 at TGV, time 12.10pm, overall I can say it was awesome, way better than Eclipse eventhough Im a big fan of Twilight, lucky thing I did not feel like having my favourite popcorn today, dont know why but I guess the combination of popcorn and coke in movies sucks! haha..ohh yes, Rick Malambri is so hot~
Movie ended at 2.00pm, went for lunch, unfortunately Suhana had to leave early as her sist was waiting, after lunch, accompanied the girls for window shopping, talked about prom, shoes, and Cua was actually looking for a necklace with a key, I have no idea what she wanna do so badly with the key, or maybe you nak open your locker yang kunci hilang tu ke babe? hahaha~ went to diva, accessorize, summit, cotton on, damn I cant remember all, so the main thing here is about the wonderful and awesome boutique, Forever 21, when we entered, the alarm sensor made noise, we were panicked, but still we act normal, like hey, c'mon we did nothing wrong peeps, so we walked in and looked for the necklace, end up we found none, so as we left, the alarm sensor rang again, i said to them 'jalan je, we did nothing wrong, buat biasa je' but the kakak security stopped us, then I walked alone through the sensor, nothing happened, Cua did the same too, and when it was Anis' turn, the sensor made noise againn, so yeah, we had to proceed to the counter for security check, one of the worker took her pencil case for scanning, the way she held it was as if she was disgusted or something, c'mon la its just a pencil case, Cua and I couldn't stop laughing and we even took a picture of it, the 'kakak security apologized' so off we go, next stop was Mph, after that back to Segi to drop Cua, as she opened the door in front of Venus, it was kinda flooded, then I went down too to change my seat to the front one, without realising, Anis was actually driving away without even looking, in malay it is 'terhegeh-hegeh'..just imagine, door was open, I was at the door, Anis was about to drive away and Cua was laughing, I wanted to say a thing but nothing came out of my mouth, LOL :) so, basically a day out was fun, Cua had this quote 'Anis & Forever 21' and I had this, 'Azreena & Car'~ It was an awesome memory and I hope there will be even more laughter after this..The picture that Cua took was tweeted on twitter, all of the other pictures couldnt be uploaded yet due to some technical errors, so main picture for this post is as you can see below~

Yeah, that one in blue uniform is the 'kakak security', the one in purple is anis, the one in black is the annoying worker who held the pencil case as if she was holding some pig skin or something..

Cant stop laughing whenever I think back about what happened~

That bear is so huge, how I wish I can have that as my Sweet 18th birthday gift, :)

Photo taken by : Cua~

STEP-UP will forever be an all time favourite~

2010-09-21T03:57:00.001+08:00

Can the happiness I once felt 3 years back come back to me sooner or later, please? :(

If I am given a chance to invent something on my own, I would like to design a time-turn-back-machine so things can be better and I will have you back in my life~

I miss you :'(

3 years and not 3 second, minutes, hours, days or weeks and I am still thinking about you, leaving near to each other but I feel like we're miles apart..there is no one but you, past love, they never got very far, but until this moment, you are what I hope for as you are the only exception and forever will be..

Tensed & Tired~

2010-09-21T03:14:00.001+08:00

I must stop thinking of how to be perfect and please others but not myself~

I am not perfect, I cant afford to please everyone anymore, I cant keep on faking a smile for the rest of my life, yes I admit that it is easy for me, but hey..I realised that it is not as easy as it seems, everyone is trying to be someone they are not, why? Why cant they just be themselves? Why cant things stay static, why must it all fall apart? Why cant people just stop being so self-centered, sarcastic, mean, unconsiderate, etc~ The best way to deal with these kind of people is just to ignore them, ignoring is the best way to avoid fights, misunderstanding, and also heartbroken~

I always wonder, why are humans not allowed to live happily without anything bothering their minds and haunting their lives, how I wish I could scream my heart out loud instead of laughing out loud whenever I feel down rather than blogging and then being stalked by some freaks out there, I am tired of living in this fake world full of dramas and up-s and down-s, everything seems to be very fake, people's kindness, words and not to be forgotten, people's promises, no matter how someone convince you, telling you that whatever bad thing that had happened is not gonna happen again, believe me, its fake! Problems and obstacles in life can never end and it will keep on happening again and again, just like the quote by a friend of mine, she said this,

Guys ; no matter how they try to convince you they're different from other guys, they'll end up doing all those motherfucking things, just like the other JERKS :)

thumbs up for you Raihan Liyana, this quote is perfectly awesome! :) so yeah, basically most of the things in this world are fake, nothing remains the same, people come and go, shits happens in life, but no matter what, life has to move on, no point thinking too much, whatever happen, happens, 'Fatin's favourite quote'..

Bleed for a smile, Cry for some fun~Impressive!

so its 0348 am now and im still not asleep yet whereas I have classes which starts in the morning, I have to wake up 3-4 hours from now, dang! :)
I just hope that tomorrow will be a better day for everyone, every single day is a new start as long as anyone i dont feel like seeing dont come my way!
It is our quote, my friends and mine, as long as we dont mess around with people, we dont split out words, sentences and statements unnecessarily which we think might hurt other's feelings, we would like people to leave us alone, cause we're perfect just the way we are!

XoXo~

A new start~

2010-09-19T18:25:00.001+08:00

Holidays are over for everyone, ATTENTION! all back to work, college, school, etc~ :)
Lately, I've been doing quite well, maybe it is because I think less about useless things, I think less about people who hurt my feelings, I think less about people who cares less about others, things like that often happen, a friend can even ditch a friend of his or her without even thinking of how the person would feel, they just couldn't be bothered at all, all they care about is only what revolves between and among themselves! Honestly I hate people like that, I've met too many, maybe I should stop being kind to everyone and change my personality to a 'mean girl', like maybe if someone ever come to me and blab, blab, blab non-stop about their problems, will I have the guts to say, 'hey, i dont care about what ure going through, go find your own solution', but I guess I just dont have the heart to say that, advising and motivating people comes out naturally, somehow it makes me wonder, why cant I deal with myself that well? hmm..so conclusion is I Hate People Who Thinks They're Great, People Who Thinks They Can Be Happy When Others Are Suffering and People Who Thinks Only Their Feelings That Matters, to people like this, Damn You!
So 20th September 2010, a new start for me, my friends and people out there, some are gonna have their finals, some gonna sit for their tests, and for my friends and myself, we're gonna be getting our results maybe tomorrow, day after, within this week, okay..seriously we're nervous, how is it gonna turn up to be like, *sighs* hopefuly its gonna be fine..
To my friends especially Fatin Hafizah who is gonna sit for her finals, all the best dear, I know you can do well, I am so gonna miss you and Raihan Liyana :'( do take care and I hope to see you both soon~
In the mean time, I might just have to stay together with my FIC girls, and yes, the whole class which consists of amazing people :) cant wait to see them~
However, there is just someone I dont wanna meet, too bad for you stranger! LOL~
So long semester 1 and Hello semester 2, hope you will treat us better~
* must stop being an owl and sleep early tonight and the following nights~
* must wake up early tomorrow, alarm must be set~
* must remember the way to Segi and how to deal with the nursing students, LOL~
* must do better in semester 2~
* must eat more when semester starts so a friend of mine, Mr.Annoying Stranger will stop calling me Alive Skeleton! LOL~ He taught me how to face freaks by using 'reverse psychology', he told me that I have to keep myself away from thinking negatively all the time~ In conclusion, he's a good friend and forever will be A Good Friend~ Thank you stranger! You annoyed me in many ways and Im thankful for that~ :)
* i must stay Happy all the time eventhough I have to keep on faking smiles for the rest of my life~

Girl, you have to stay positive, life is too short to be wasted, too many things to be explored and if you keep on thinking negatively and have bad perspectives towards everything, you will end up nowhere~ That '3 years' back is what I still have in mind until today and if I were to think positive, I am pretty sure that moment of happiness will come back to me sooner or later~

I must keep that in mind..<3

Dreams should be kept alive~

2010-09-17T19:24:00.000+08:00

Do you remember the nights we'd stay up just laughing

Smiling for hours at anything

Remember the nights we drove around crazy in love

When the lights go out

We'll be safe and sound

We'll take control of the world like it's all we have to hold on to

And we'll be a dream

Do you remember the nights we made our way dreaming

Hoping of being someone big

We were so young and we were too crazy in love

When the lights go out

We'll be safe and sound

We'll take control of the world like it's all we have to hold on to

And we'll be a

16th September 2010, 0303am~

2010-09-17T18:55:00.001+08:00

Awake from a silent but uncomfortable sleep due to various of continuous nightmares, maybe it is because I over-think about lots of things the night before, slept straight after shower without taking dinner, consciousness took place at 0213am, went to my brother's room next door, this little teenage kid was not asleep yet, Fb-ing, Youtube-ing and surfing as well, told him I was craving for my favourite DoubleCheeseBurger ( DCB ), haha~ talked for awhile, funny thing, I reminded him about childhood times, laughed non-stop, until he asked me, 'why are you so hyper', and i kept laughing even more, then he told me to go to bed, he said he will wake me up at 0410am to call Mc'D, I was like, 'betul ke, tipu siap', he responded with this 'betul la, pegi tidur sekarang'..
my laughter slowly fade away as i went back to my room through the connected toilet door exit, :D

So at 0445am, he came over, took my phone which had only Rm3.69 left to call the number 1300-13-1300, I was afraid if we couldn't make an order before my prepaid credit runs out, haha...luckily we manage to, unfortunately I did not get to have my DCB as they dont do delivery for that meal yet, so my brother and I ordered the Sausage Egg McMuffin breakfast set, and Fillet-O-Fish for my little btother, total of all cost me a lucky number of 2695, haha~ at least i get to fill my empty stomach yaww~ What a

disaster being an owl, staying awake in the middle of the night, eat and next gain weight which I hate the most..Haizz, used up my own cash just because mom and dad wasn't awake at that time~ so, there you go, wonderful meal with my brother in the middle of the night or I may say early in the morning, XoXo~
*ohh yes, it is better to stay up awake late night playing playstation or finding food stuffs to eat rather than talking on the phone, trying your best, helping someone who turns out to be a self-centered freak at the end of the day..

DSLR! :)

2010-09-15T03:47:00.000+08:00

I am now adding something new into my wish list, besides a new electric guitar, I am in love with ey DSLR camera, its awesome, I dont know why but this gadget has got high sense of attraction which makes me wanna own it though, I admire whoever who owns this freaking expensive item, moreover I love taking pictures, my 5th choice was to be a photographer, but I end up choosing HRM which was not in my list actually, but its okay, I believe by majoring in this course, I will be able to find a good job in future, earn lots and lots of $, haha..maybe only then I can afford to get myself a professional camera, so that every moments can be captured and treasured, right now I guess I just have to stick to mom's 10.0 megapixel samsung camera, well its not that bad actually but still, I would like to have 'my own' dslr someday, maybe not now for sure, I dont want my parents or any family members hard earn money wasted just to get me my dream camera, I am not a king's princess or a Prime Minister's daughter, I am not rich, I dont earn 1k or more per month, I am just a college student, haha.. perhaps I might just have to wait, 'patience' is a magic word, :) so yeah, dear professional camera, please be mine someday~ People's saying, if you want something, then work hard for it, so you will know how to value it when u own it, that's what Im gonna do~ :)

Various types of Dslr, though Im not good with all this, well at least, I will be doing some research or seeking opinions someday when I feel that time has arrived for me to get one, <3

XoXo~

2010-09-14T18:23:00.000+08:00

This is my friendship necklace, the one with the word Best is with ~~Raihan Liyana~~ and the one with the word Forever is with ~~Fatin Hafizah~~~ <3

Besides having a friendship necklace, I also have friendship bracelets, there's only 4 hands in this picture, from left, ~~Anis Shamin, Nasuha Hamzah, Azreena Sherene & Suhana Dahaman, Iffa Nadya'~~s picture isn't in here as well as ~~Megala Nadaraja~~'s..

So, I just wanna say I am thankful because I have besties like them and I own both necklace and bracelet :)

Hopefuly our friendship will last long and shall be there no fights or misunderstanding at any times..

Girls, I love you all :)

Peace~

2010-09-14T17:57:00.001+08:00

5th day of raya and Im enjoying boredom at home, I think by now, still many people are enjoying their Eid celebration in their hometowns, playing firecrackers, going around the kampung and all, well basically there's nothing much to talk about, we left Penang on the third day of raya, 4pm and guess what, I reached home at 2am in the morning, so its 10 hours being in the car, we were unfortunate as we got stuck in a very bad traffic jam from Taiping until Sg.Perak, there itself we spent 3hours, like duhh...till legs got cramp and all..had a light dinner at Sg.Perak, ohh my god, human jam was effing bad that night, so yeah, thank God, got home safely, washed up and straight to my soft and comfy bed, ZzZzZz..slept well, too tired I guess, hmm..overall 3days of raya in Penang was just fine, not much entertainment as before, maybe it's because teenagers like my brother and I, growing up, coudn't go around the kampung, knocking on people's door asking for duit raya anymore, haha...I miss old times that is why I often repeat I want to be a little girl, hey..you get many good things out of it you know, :D being a little girl, you can sit and play with your barbie without anything bothering you, you can go to bed at night without thinking about useless and stressful things and yeah, without a single tear, so lately I had been doing fine, I am getting over things very well, I am done with all those craps, and honestly I am happy now because I have nobody to bother me and give me troubles anymore, haha.. so..tomorrow, which is on Wenesday 15th Sept, i plan to go out with my college besties, Anis and Nasuha , Suhana is not back yet, Iffa still enjoying her raya I guess, Megala staying home entertaining her new boyfriend, Raihan must be busy, and Fatin is still in Singapore, hopefuly the sleepover this time can come true, Ray..just wait for the other aunty to come home :D
so to-do list for tomorrow, maybe watch step-up 3d, resident evil, vampires suck or na'ahh..I dont know what other movies that is Now Showing in theatres, so yeah..we'll see, in the mean time, I am looking forward to meet my FIC Girls this monday..at last, I think I managed to find peace eventhough not 100%, XoXo~

Is it possible~

2010-09-11T19:08:00.000+08:00

Second day of raya~ Basically yesterday was just fine, woke up at 10.30am, did not go for Eid prayer, actually planned to go but night before slept late, so was kinda lazy, ermm..received duit raya from a few people including mom and dad, ate laksa which was so tasty, :) like to briefly conclude, nothing much happened actually, one of the weird thing that happened is that peope in this kampung's money went missing, first it was my brother's, then my cousin's and next my aunty's..not only us but also few others lost their money, so i guess creature called toyol still does exist, like yeah..mom said so, its creepy though, had goosebumps when listening to it, after that to tok long's house, and next to tok wan's, overall yesterday was a tiring day, arrived home around 9.00 pm, traffic was bad as people were heading to the popular HardRock cafe here in Penang, at home, showered, had laksa for dinner and straight to bed, seriously after weeks sleeping late, I actually slept early yesterday, haha..weird..:D today, woke up late, 2pm in the afternoon, had lunch then some relatives came over, I do not know why but I feel really down today, not in a mood at all, maybe because I over think and I choose to go through depression, like the quote, Pain is inevitable, Suffering is optional, probably I am suffering just because I choose to, but what to do, this is what and how I am, its almost 7pm now and I am still not in a good mood, sometimes it makes me think, is it possible for time to fly faster than it is now so I do not need to think about the bad times, is it possible for people to live happily without any problems in life, is it possible for everything to come our way without any obstacles? is it possible for people to smile all day long without frowning? and yes, I know, it is not possible..when no one else is with you, even the sounds of wind can be heard, alone~
Things should be made as simple as possible, but not any simpler. -Albert Einstein

Eid Mubarak :)

2010-09-10T03:25:00.002+08:00

okay people, first of all..Hi :) it had been a few days after my last post, so here's the thing, at first I seriously thought of deleting my blogsite, since something happened, haha..but guess what, I aint gonna be that dumb to do that just to please freaks out there, LOL..my besties said I am way better off without them in my life, so I guess its true though.. basically my 'balik kampung journey' was not bad, we left home on last day of fasting month, like yeah..early in the morning, 4.30 am is the time we left home, went for sahur first then sent my maid back to her husband, around 6 am, left my housing area, night before that, did not sleep, had a chat with few people, my lil' cousin's boyfriend, gave him some piece of advise, had a chat with my friend syukri on ym, nasuha hamzah on ym, suhana dahaman on ym, well I did tweet but aniskhunnie was already asleep I guess, ermm..journey was very smooth, *tweeted twice and updated status on Fb once*, on the road, not much traffic except for this one spot whe we got stuck in traffic jam for almost half an hour, because a really big lorry of vegetables tumbled upside down, pity that lorry guy, I hope he's alright..reached Penang around 11.30 am, went to meet mom's friend, received a gift, a necklace with precious moon stone, dont know but mom said it suits me well though..:) yeay! after that to tok's crib, helped to sort out the raya cookies and all, along the journey, did not get to sleep well, so I ended up sleeping at 4.30 pm in the evening and woke up at 7 pm, seriously, I was effing tired, so after breaking fast, took bath, mom and tok was busy cooking rendang, I accompanied afiq on the swing outside, hmm..dont know why, but somehow I feel like there aint any excitement for raya this year, like hmm..crapp~ well, hopefuly tomorrow will be better, right now everyone is asleep and I am the only one who is stil awake, as usual..:) so to my friends, thank you so much for the raya texts, love ya'll :) ohh and yes, I feel great because I get to bring my guitar along too, luckily there was enough space for that precious asset of mine, well yeahh, guess that is all for now, tomorrow will surely be a busy and tiring day, hopefuly everything is gonna go on smoothly :) btw, i do miss kl though, sancha natasha aguilar, say Hi to all aite, will write more when Im free, so people, Happy Hari Raya and Maaf Zahir Batin, forgive me for all my wrong doings, enjoy your raya guys, XoXo~

speechless~

2010-09-07T19:21:00.000+08:00

i hope ure sattisfied enough~ so from now onwards, please leave me alone, that would be very kind of you :) thank you

p/s: speaking in general, no specific person mentioned..

New semester~

2010-09-06T05:51:00.003+08:00

Okay, Raya is just around the corner, like seriously i have nothing much to write since it has not happened yet, just a few basic things like, raya preparations, new clothes, *p/s: i love my new dress..:), raya cookies to bring back to penang..and yeah, the best part is about 'Duit Raya'..LOL..
after a month fasting, we get to have fun and be thankful because we're still given a chance to experience the fun of celebrating Eid~ so, on the way back to penang, not sure whether I will be able to blog along the journey, so I created Twitter and installed it into my phone, just for me to not feel bored.. -.- yeay! awesome..about blogging, will maybe write it down and type it as my new post when I reach..ohh wait~ this is so not about Eid..this is actually about my new semester schedule which I will be attending with my FIC girls after Eid celebration, well basically our new timetable turns out to be very tiring because we have classes, like yeah..Every single day..

on monday, we have Accounting and Econs between 12.15pm until 5.00pm..
on tuesday, Accounting and Academic English between 9.00am until 3.15pm..

on wednesday, Quantitative Methods 9.00 until 11.30..

on thursday, Quantitative Methods, Malaysian Studies between 12.15pm until 6.30pm..
and on fridays, we have Economics going on too..

like ohmygod, it will be a little bit tiring, but I guess its okay, there are some people's schedule which is even worst, so I guess we cant make it thru this 2nd semester, I still have my awesome classmates and my amazing Besties in class, dont have to worry much about others..XOXO~

its good to have pack schedule sometimes, it keeps you awayy from thinking too much, like seriously~ :)

Still the way it is~

2010-09-02T02:29:00.001+08:00

Letting go..

I need more time, lots of it~

I wanna fLy freely like them, being high up above in the sky will make me worry less about the things happening in life, just like the way the birds are living their lives happily~

Sparkles :)

2010-09-01T22:17:00.000+08:00

haha, yes..I know its not time yet to play fire crackers since we still have a few days left for fasting, but seriously, believe me, by now, not only little kids, but mostly everyone already started playing these stuffs, they're fun..:)

It keeps you laughing when someone holds it and make a joke out of it in their own way, LOL..my entire family did a great joke by only holding two of these in their hands, my brother and I couldn't even stop laughing but yeah, I feel better when i LOL, at least I keep myself away from thinking too much about things Im not supposse to :)

and ohh yes, it is pretty because it can 'sparkle', like seriously man, its effing pretty just like the way you see it in the pictures included :)

Cant wait to play more, by the sea side, so I can play those with louder sound effects, without bothering about anyone, ahaha..

well, of course, my favourite is still pop-pop, its cute though~

XoXo :)

perfect couple~

2010-08-31T05:11:00.001+08:00

every Hello makes you feel like you've got the greatest give ever

BUT......

every Hello ends with a word you never expected which is a..

well, i guess Hello and Goodbye is meant to be a great couple~

yes, I've learnt the difference and it hurts but life still goes on, xoxo

Whatever happened shall be remembered~

2010-08-28T23:42:00.001+08:00

Leaving is your choice, happiness is what I get from that~

2010-08-28T21:46:00.002+08:00

Just because you dont see something, it does not mean it isn't there, you've got to use all your senses to feel and understand what I feel for you, look back on all the things I do, all the words I've said before, that would probably make you realise how much you mean to me until this moment, how i wish you're here and I can tell this one undescribable feeling that I am feeling now~ I dont wanna cry over you anymore, is there any way for me to get over this, I admit that it is tough but I am trying to get used to it~so yeah, a person who is selfish like you, my tears ain't worth it, my friends said, Im way better off without you, I deserve better things rather than craps like this, so feel free to LEAVE ME ALONE and let me live my life happily~

somehow i know someone loves me :)

2010-08-28T18:31:00.002+08:00

who loves me?

>God <

>Parents<

>Siblings<

>Friends<

>Entire Family<

>Fatin Nur Hafizah<

>Raihan Liyana<

>Hidayati Nasuha<

>Suhana Dahaman<

>Anis Shamim<

>Eifa Nadia<

>Megala Nadaraja<

fatin and raihan, the both of you know how much you both mean to me..

my Fic girls, you know how crazy we are when we get together, you girls light up my college life, make me worry less, and keep me away from thinking about how much i actually miss school life..I do not need anyone else besides these people listed, :)

2010-08-28T18:01:00.001+08:00

Nur Azreena Sherene Haiqal Kenneth Lim is the name, 18 24th December 2010, Segi College Kota Damansara, Foundation In Commerce, Degree in HRM, snobbish, arrogant, quiet is everyone's first impression on me, friendly and a girl who talks non-stop + funny is what they feel when they get to know me better, :).. i admit i have terrible mood swings at times, thinking of how we have to accept fate really hurts, once had a blogsite bofore, deleted it, currently starting on a new one when i actually realised that in life there are so many things to be expressed, sometimes it is not everything that you cann tell your family, your friends, your close ones, siblings, counselor, and bla, bla, bla..
so i guess i decided to write once again to express all what i felt, what i am feeling and what i am about to feel in the future, blogging, a good way of talking not to yourself but to let what you feel noticable whenever someone reads it, at times it is hard to find a person who truly understands you + talking to a person needs time, so why wanna waste people's time just to make them listen when the fact is you dont even know whether 'he' or 'she' really understand how you actually feel, might as well write it out, give them time to read and understand by themselves, :)

Fatin Nur Hafizah, a girl who inspired me to start writing again, a girl whom i met in high school, means a lot to me, i have bestfriends back in highschool, and now in college, wanna know who they are, well i guess the next post will be about them, :) they mean a lot to me, they light up my life whenever i feel down and whenever i feel that there is no one who cares and whenever i feel like life is worthless, i was afraid to start writing again because i was afraid people might condemn me, the way i write, they way i express myself and picking on my errors, well i guess we just have to realise, in life, people make mistakes and creates errors, so it is better to judge our ownselves before we even judge others, having faith in myself finally made me stronger and have the courage to start writing again, my blogsite might not be an interesting one, attractive one, but all i can say is, it is my writing site, read it or you dont, makes no difference, my life is my life, so starting from now onwards, i can say that this is a new beginning in life for me, i will write more about what i felt, what i am currently feeling, and what i am about to feel in the future in this journey called LIFE, it is too short to be wasted, so have fun while ure in it, happy reading :) XoXo..

I'll Be the Wings That Keep Your Heart In the Clouds :)

Misdescribed

This is all for you, i hope it will at least make you realize something

If only you can be a lil' bit honest

IF BEFORE THIS I HAVE TOO MUCH TO BLOG YET I DIDN’T DO SO, I GUESS YOU DID A GREAT JOB BY MAKING ME BLOG SIMPLY ABOUT YOU, *THUMBS UP*

first post for 2011~

Few more hours to a new journey~

18th Birthday 2010~

Misanthropy!

Just A Dream- Nelly

One In A Million- Ne-Yo~

Limited time to have unlimited fun~

You Be the Anchor That Keeps My Feet On the Ground, I'll Be the Wings That Keep Your Heart In the Clouds :)

RandoM~

Love The Way You Lie part 2~

Im just plain stupid~

Dead, Dead, Dead~

Friends~

Cooler than me~

need no caption~

YoU~

Perfect Nightmare~

September :) a song that can make me cry~

Not in sequence~

The truth~

It's either stopping or not~

It goes on~

Guitar~

Quotes~

Too Bad~

conversation~

A Day Out for Step-Up, Anis & Forever21, Azreena & Car~

Tensed & Tired~

A new start~

Dreams should be kept alive~

16th September 2010, 0303am~

DSLR! :)

XoXo~

Peace~

Is it possible~

Eid Mubarak :)

speechless~

New semester~

Still the way it is~

Sparkles :)

perfect couple~

Whatever happened shall be remembered~

Leaving is your choice, happiness is what I get from that~

somehow i know someone loves me :)

IF BEFORE THIS I HAVE TOO MUCH TO BLOG YET I DIDN’T DO SO, I GUESS YOU DID A GREAT JOB BY MAKING ME BLOG SIMPLY ABOUT YOU, THUMBS UP